Muslim Arranged Marriages is it allowed?
Well all marriages are arranged in some way or another. The implication of Muslim Arranged Marriage usually means force marriages. As a bottom line rule, Islam does not permit force marriages at all; the nikah (marriage) must be accepted by both the bride and groom without force. If there is an element of force from any person, relation or direction, that party will be responsible on the day of judgement for oppression, which will not be a very good situation to be in. So we have established firstly, that forced marriages be it because of family dignity, wealth, relations, a business transaction, or any other weird reason why someone may force someone else into a marriage is totally forbidden and the responsible parties will be accountable.
In the case of an arranged marriage, this is allowed and encouraged. The explanation of an arranged marriage means that the marriage is arranged in some way or another, i.e. the parents either arrange it, the bride and groom arrange it or anybody else arranges it, as a thought I am sure every marriage that’s happened on the earth has been an arranged marriage, as you don’t wake up one day and automatically enter into a marriage.
A Muslim Arranged Marriage is somewhat similar, as the Prophet (Pbuh) has given the Muslims guidelines in how to go into a marriage, for example the well known Hadith (Saying of the Prophet) of Bukhari and Muslim:
“A woman (or man) may be married for four things: for her wealth, for her noble descent, for her beauty or for her religion. Choose the one who is religious, lest your hands be rubbed with dust!” (Bukhari and Muslim)
The compatibility and suitability should be based on four things, 1) Wealth 2) Background 3) Beauty 4) Piety; the Prophet encouraged the preference of piety over the others.
A critic may say that this is discrimination, the answer fairly simple, that this is not an obligation, this is a guideline by which the more you are compatible with each other the more likely your marriage would bond for a lifetime, and if you are both pious; you would respect, love and care for each other the same way you would like to be respected, loved and cared for, it’s quite simple really. There are many other guidelines which the Prophet has set out for the Muslim community and if one would like further information they must ask a person of knowledge and research related topics.
The young men and women that are being forced against their will into a marriage must make a stand for themselves and bring to light the Quranic teachings against such oppression. This arranged (meant to be forced) marriages is not an Islamic tradition, but more of an Asian tradition from cultures in Pakistan, India, China, Malaysia and many more. Islam was introduced by Allah and the Prophet to put a stop to this all and provide a platform of freedom and choice within the boundaries of Islam.
I know this is easy to say but this is your challenge, if you are being forced; Stop being forced and put your foot down respectfully but affirmatively without breaking relations (It is a major challenge but after hardship there is ease).
Hard to say really, if you have as oppositions very stubborn, arrogant people that do not respect Islamic laws, then it could end messy. Otherwise, happy days. Peace on all